By Compiled by Emily Rivard

In Class:Girl: I am so pissed my new car just came out with a convertible model. I had my dad put his name on the waiting list. Guy: What type of car?Girl: The new Lexus.Guy: When did you get it?Girl: Not long ago. When I was buying it they told me it was coming out as a convertible but I wanted it NOW. But now I want the convertible version so Daddy is going to buy it for me.

Outside the Student Center:Girl: I mean, I needed to take a s–t, what was I supposed to do, wait outside? When you gotta go, you gotta go. I can’t tell my body not to regurgitate my food!

Around Campus:Custodian: Obama is now president. Yeah. I guess this means I can go back to smoking pot.

In the unispan:Guy: I think our babies would make great grand-babies.

In a classroom:Girl: My mother calls me a pleasant surprise…that she cried about for a weekend.

Outside the Student Center:Guy: I’m really good at a lot of things. I’m really good at bumming people for money, I’m really good at not paying people back.

Around campus:Girl: You get a promise ring if your boyfriend’s going to Iraq. But he’s going to Texas. That’s kind of like Iraq.