By Compiled by Jillian Sorgini
In Suffolk Residence Hall:Guy: And then he was like ‘muy bien’ and I was like “Damn!…Mexican.”
In class:Girl: Are there zebras in Australia?
Around campus:Girl: People who name their wieners are stupid.
In class:Professor: You can read about McCain’s and Obama’s stances on the Web.Student: Yeah, but no one reads anymore.
Around campus:Guy: Those areolas are too stretchy, but those are some dynamite nipples.
Around campus:Girl #1: Is there a Hepatitis C?Girl #2: Yes.Girl #1: Okay, so there’s A, B and C and they just invented Hepatitis D right?
In the Hofstra Deli:Guy: If Obama can lower Lackmann prices, I’m voting for him.
Outside student center:Girl on phone: He is selling dime bags and he thinks he can raise our baby.
In the student center:Girl: I’d go with white because red [wine] makes me horny and I’d rather not rape any of you tonight.