By Jillian Sorgini

In The Chronicle office:Girl: Does hard-on have a hyphen? Or is it a single word?

Student center:Guy: Do you want a peanut? It tastes much better than penis.Girl: No. I like the taste of penis.

Student center:Girl: It’s so hot in here! Thank God I didn’t wear pants!

At a baseball game:Guy: The ‘King of Wishful Thinking’ has really helped through some tough times.

Around campus:Guy: My friend was bulimic and it really helped her. She looks really good now.Around campus:Girl: If someone bought me a quesadilla maker, hell, I’d have sex with him.

Around campus:Girl: He is so weird! He likes you for your brains and not your breasts!

Student center:Guy: I just want to let you know that I’m going to get my cheese from the deli line.Lackmann Employee: You do you, kid.

Around campus:Girl: How old are you?Guy: Old enough to know that you’re a whore.

On the unispan:Girl: You work at the bar. I know you make money. Isn’t it about time to buy new shoes?Around campus:Guy: When I go tanning I put a sock on. I don’t wanna get weiner cancer.

Around campus:Girl: Oh my God. I saw a girl with huge thighs wearing a mini skirt. It looked like two whales fighting for control.

In class:Professor: Unfortunately, you can’t bring in bundle of corn to Hofstra and trade it for an English class.

Around campus:Guy: Incest is my favorite carnal sin.

Around campus:Girl #1: Oh, you’ll be here for Christmas.Girl #2: Christmas?Girl #1: Yeah, Fleet Week is Christmas.