By Compiled by Emily Rivard
Outside CV Starr cafe:
Guy: What happened to you? You’re nice all of a sudden.
Girl: …You’re mean.
Guy: Seriously, you were like a witch or something.
Around campus:
Gay Guy: Yep, there’s nothin’ like a good pregnancy scare.
Straight Guy: Not for us.
In the Student Center:
Girl: Girlfriend, we have to go tanning tonight. Mandatorily.
Around campus:
Girl: Your car is a magnet for Mexicans.
In the Student Center:
Girl 1: (pointing to squash and zucchini) Can I have greenies and yellows?
Girl 2: You don’t know the names?
Girl 1: No, and I don’t want to make myself sound more ignorant.
On the Unispan:
Girl (on the way to the academic side of campus): I have no classes today. I was supposed to go back to C [Square]. Why am I here?
In CV Starr:
Girl 1: I just touched the toilet water.
Girl 2: Why, did you decide to dip in?
Girl 1: No, I was just testing the waters.
Outside Liberty:
Girl: Did you just pee?! Did you just pee out the window?!
In Class:
Prof: (talking about Obama’s 100th day) It’s like Obamafest. Cinco de Obama.
In the Student Center:
Guy: I’m so pro-Pete DiSilvio, if I was gay, I’d f*** him.
In the Student Center:
Girl: Coming down from Adderall is like coming down from a drug.
In Class:
Prof: The eye of the potato is toxic. You do not eat it, unless you want to kill a small child. No one is going to say, “let’s eat the potato eye.”
In Class:
Prof: Don’t you people know how to aim low?
Guy: We always do.
Outside Student Center:
Guy: I usually drink seven or eight nights a week.