By Jory Heckman, Special to the Chronicle
Long Island middle school students are giving thanks, but not necessarily because of Thanksgiving.
According to a study led by Jeffrey Froh, a Hofstra professor of childhood psychology, 10-year-old children begin to develop a mature sense of appreciation once they have a firm understanding of gratitude.
“They [ten-year-olds] really start to get it,” said Froh. “They get a sense of empathy—a sense that ‘Hey, this person really went out of their way for me. It cost this person time and money; look at how much I’ve gotten from it.'”
While the holiday season inevitably prompts adolescents to reflect on the good in their lives, this message resonates more deeply once they hit the double-digit milestone.
“Early on, it’s this polite routine; it’s a social script,” said Froh, suggesting that cues from parents and teachers play an integral role in their children’s formative years.
“It’s about being there to help them identify the good stuff,” said Froh.
Taking his 4-year-old son outside to look at the autumn leaves, Froh was taken aback by his precious observations.
“I asked him what he thought about it. He said it was beautiful. How cool is that, that he appreciated that?”
Not to confuse family with work, Froh published his study based on a survey sample of 700 middle school students from a single public middle school.
The initial feedback, along with 3 month and 6 month follow-ups, indicates that grateful, upbeat students generally perform better in school, as measured by their GPAs.
“Being thankful isn’t just saying thanks,” wrote one 11-year-old student. “It’s a divine feeling that isn’t hideable. When you truly are thankful you will do something in return because you owe it to the person and society.”
Drawing from his research, Froh finds that gratitude enables adolescents to build significant, long-term relationships. “It’s something you need in yourself and in other people,” he said.
The rise of social media, however, may cause a backslide in development for children of the Internet age.
“They learn to be more superficial [when online],” warned Froh. “You’ve got to be grateful for the real people in your life, not just, ‘I have 300 friends [on Facebook].'”
After extensive peer-review, Froh’s paper, “Being grateful is beyond good manners: Gratitude and motivation to contribute to society among early adolescents,” has been published in Motivation and Emotion.
