By Michaela Papa, Columnist

After sitting down to write my editorial, I became distracted by the Internet—a true rarity. I intended to write about the hard-hitting news of the season change, but in the process stumbled upon an article that may excite a few more people. Recently released is a Duke University girl’s divulgence of, what she called, “an education beyond the classroom: excelling in the realm of horizontal academics.” Within the 42-slide PowerPoint presentation she recounts her experiences with 13 Duke athletes. Despite its claimed intent, her thesis is getting more review than she could have ever anticipated.

Karen Owen states her intentions on slide two, qualifying her escapades for the sake of research. “Until now,” she begins, “no studies have succeeded in developing a methodology for quantifying and ranking these so-called horizontal academics.” She continues to say her evaluations will “hopefully [allow] for future maximization of enjoyment of such procedures.” While I haven’t written many theses or PowerPoint Presentations (complete with bar graphs) on sexual prowess, I feel as though her intent couldn’t have been solely for personal use. The language within is far from colloquial, begging the question—who was meant to read this? Claiming it was for a small inner circle, I think the true violators are her friends. It’s clearly stated in girl code you are not to let 42-slide PowerPoint dissertations on sex-lives go viral.

I applaud Owen’s commitment to her dissertation, I do. She set out with a goal and accomplished it. Formulaic in design, each subject was reviewed on physical attractiveness, size, talent, creativity, aggressiveness, entertainment, athletic ability and bonus points allotted for “extraneous factors”. These are the components in the aforementioned evaluation process. Owen was thorough. The last few slides include: the evaluation procedure, “The Official F*ck List” (complete with a bar graph of the list) and acknowledgements. Owen made sure to give thanks to her greatest participant: alcohol.

In one review, Owen includes text transactions from “Subject 7.” One reads, “I want you now. Come over now.” The rest are not as eloquent. All in the sake of data collection, Owen has compiled nothing short of an impressive experiment. While I admit she has a Duke education, and is several levels more articulate about drunken, black-out sex than most, it’s arguable whether or not this deems her privy to a book deal with one of America’s leading publishing companies.

A HarperCollins’ publisher considers Owens to be “a very good, funny writer, and I’m wondering if she has any interest in writing a book.” The editor goes on to claim, “She’s like the female equivalent of Tucker Max, and I admire his sense of self-empowerment!” Owen has no real grounds on which to be ashamed for her documentation of 13 Duke men’s abilities.

Many knew of her intended acquisition of data. Perhaps the only moral questioning lays in why America rewards the indulgent sexual nature of so many? Tucker Max’s book, in which he details a plethora of sexual encounters, was a New York Times Bestseller. How does that differ from Owen’s eloquent and conclusive research project? The very fact that a genre entitled “fratire” exists should make America question her inner-bro. For those not as versed in this genre, fratire combines misogyny and literacy, two of America’s most critical advances.

Upon unanticipated release, the subjects’ names were not removed. Owen states, “inclusion of the real names are causing this awful situation to escalate even further and is actually starting to affect peoples’ lives in ways that go far beyond mere embarrassment.”Owen is doing the best she can in the given situation. Her diary just happens to be much more developed and pragmatic than the average girl. Admittedly, her intent is incredulous, leaving thirteen men’s private lives quite literally exposed. Despite this, Owens wrote a rather tactful review on a rather intimate matter. The real question is whether or not Owens earned her desired “degree in tempestuous frolicking.”