Photo by James Factora
Imagine it’s late at night. You’ve just come back from a night out with friends, laughing and regaling at the campus hotspot, HofUSA. You ordered the chicken nuggets, a classic dish. Your friends warned you, but hungry and naive, you persisted.
Oh, how wrong you were.
It started with a rumble. Then, it grew into a grumble. Then, a mighty roar erupted in the pit of your stomach. That’s when you knew you needed to use the restroom, and fast. You make it just in time, but as you are sitting there, lamenting the choices that have led you to this moment emptying your bowels in a HofUSA bathroom stall on a Wednesday night, you hear … another rumble.
Not from your stomach. This time, it comes from the pipes. The automatic toilet begins to flush while you are using it, and you feel microscopic particles of your chicken nugget disaster return with a vengeance. You return to your dorm – the walk of shame. You shower but still feel, somehow, violated.
Now, this would never happen to me. I’m a vegan, which means that I am morally obligated to proclaim my dietary choices every other sentence, but also, that I do not eat chicken nuggets, and therefore this predicament would never befall me. But as a student on Hofstra’s campus, I too have been subjected to the righteous injustice that is our university’s automatic toilets. While many have been installed during recent construction, I firmly assert they should remain a relic of the recent past. Much like the robot overlords which some speculate will one day dominate mankind, these toilets are a technological menace: unsanitary, unsustainable and inconsiderate to the diverse needs of the Hofstra community.
First and foremost, automatic toilets are ticking time bombs of bacteria and fecal matter. According to the Journal of Applied Microbiology, microorganisms reach a vertical height of 2.7 feet after a toilet is flushed, although some scientists predict that number to be as high as six feet. Either way, the two to six foot splash zone is decidedly within the proximity to a toilet with which the standard person relieves themselves. This means when a toilet automatically flushes, you will almost certainly be in the splash zone.
Moreover, these toilets are environmentally wasteful. One report in Tampa, Florida found automatic toilets may use up to 50% more water than a manual-flush toilet. This leads to hundreds of gallons of water waste per year, per toilet.
Finally, automatic toilets are incompatible with students with a physical disability, who may struggle to sit and stand and therefore exacerbate the excess flushing problem. Observant Jewish students might be unable to use electricity during holy days due to their faith. Therefore, they and/or their visiting family or friends may struggle to meet basic hygiene needs within areas of Hofstra’s campus with automatic toilets, such as the Student Center or most residential buildings.
Automatic toilets are an inefficient, needless expense which inconvenience students and dirty our environment. I believe Hofstra officials should reconsider the use of automatic toilets in future renovations. If we listen to the facts over faux promises of water conservation and cleanliness, then we can all make the best of a crappy situation together.
Sarah Emily Baum is a sophomore double majoring in journalism and public policy. Find her on Twitter
@SarahEmilyBaum.
