By Carmen Sutra

Let’s face it: relationships are a lot of work. When the fighting sets in, things can get pretty miserable for all parties involved. When it comes to breakups, there are two different breeds. First, there are the ones where both feel the relationship has run its course and they can part with a mutual respect and agreement. Secondly, and perhaps the more hurtful of the two-the unexpected “I’m not in love with you any more-I’ve found someone else” kind of breakup. This kind of break-up hardly ever ends on a good note lately it seems people are coming up with more vicious ways to kick their partner to the curb.

Recently one of my friends fell victim to a heartless act of breakup injustice. She had been dating this boy for nearly six months. They talked on the telephone a few times a day and for hours each night; needless to say things were going pretty smoothly. Then, day-by-day the calls were more scarce. Not knowing what to do, she called the guy more often and found herself in a deep relationship with his voicemail. To her surprise, after several days of not speaking, she received an e-mail from her loving “boyfriend.” The e-mail, which was comprised of a mere four sentences, was the big “it’s over” message. Shocked, appalled and hurt by the fact that her sixth month relationship deserved no more than a lousy four sentence e-mail, my friend did what any self-respecting dumpee would do in this situation-she got mad. The actions of my friend’s guy were down-right rude and weasily but let’s face it, many people are looking for the quickest route to easy-way-out street (Even Carrie Bradshaw got dumped by Burger on a Post-It).

And it’s guys and girls similar to my friend’s boyfriend that are supporting new Web sites popping up all over the Internet to make it more impersonal and effortless for people to dump their significant others. The Boston based company, dumpmonkey.com, is just one of these sites that specialize in ending relationships. For just $24.95 you can send your former beau a 16″ stuffed monkey, a personalized certificate from Dump U that includes a note card explaining the situation and also a follow up call to the recipient from some Joe-Shmo at the company just to make sure the recipient knows they have been dumped.

“Our response has been overwhelmingly positive,” says John Evangelista, co-owner of dumpmonkey.com, “So much so that we have decided to branch out.”

Dumpmonkey.com now features such products as “the spring break monkey,” “wanna have a threesome monkey” and even “I’m going home for summer monkey,” which all include personalized certificates.

“Basically, the idea behind our expansion is that people these days have a tendency to ‘take breaks’ from one another at certain times of the year,” says Janis Owens, co-founder of dumpmonkey.com. “Let’s face it, a college student going on spring break or heading home for the summer may not want to have ties to that certain special someone while they are away. The least they can do is be honest about it.”

As if this isn’t humiliating enough, dumpmonkey.com also posts a long list of the recently dumped with their name, who dumped them and when they were dumped.

And low and behold the laziest of all ways to break up-goodbyebitch.com allows dumpers to go online and fill out several short answer questions and the Web site automatically writes the breakup letter for you. These Mad-Libs style Dear John Letter are becoming more frequently used. Maybe pretty soon you can just break up with your significant other through mental telepathy and it won’t require any effort at all.