By Compiled by Jillian Sorgini
In The Chronicle Office:Guy: Did you hear about Spitzer?Girl: Yeah. Serves those Republicans right!Guy: Actually, he’s a Democrat.
Around campus:Guy: I had sex and watched “Star Wars” at the same time. Yeah-huh I did. My light-saber definitely came on.
In the Student Center:Girl #1: I didn’t go to my first class today.Girl #2: Oh yeah, I noticed you didn’t go.Girl #1: Yeah, I was wondering why no one asked me why I wasn’t there.
In Dutch Treats:Guy #1: She must be really excited about that.Guy #2: Yeah, she’s sitting at home giving herself Dutch ovens over it.
On the unispan:Guy: If my testes were a foreign super power, they would be China.
In The Chronicle Office:Girl #1: You having a pitbull is believable, [Name], having sex is not.Girl #2: She’s, like, asexual.
In the Student Center cafeteria:Girl #1: I’m gonna get chicken parm…Hey Sam, I think I’m going to get chicken parm,Girl #2: Yeah, I know, I heard you the first eight times you said it.
In The Chronicle office:Girl: I can get rid of his butt crack on Photoshop!
Walking toward Breslin Hall:Guy #1: How do you fail with a prostitute?Guy #2: I don’t know.