By Compiled by Emily Rivard and Erin Furman
In Suffolk:
Girl: The day someone could read my mind would be a sad day for humanity.
Around Campus:
Girl: I’ve seen his privates, so I don’t think I need to be his Facebook friend.
Around Campus:
Guy: I’ve come up with the perfect job. I’m going to critique gay porn.
Girl: But isn’t there lesbian porn, too?
Guy: No, but that’s funny. What’s funny is me watching guys have sex and telling them how to do it better…. I live for the irony.
Around Campus:
Girl: So were the lines [on your shoes] talking to your?
Guy: No, I thought it was God playing a prank on me. Saying like, “Fine, you wanna get this high? I’m going to f*** with you.”
Around Campus:
Girl: I used to have a fling with a guy who used to dress up randomly in a banana suit.