By Nicholas Kingsbury
I’m holding a Raisinet up to the light streaming through my window. It’s an ugly candy with a deformed shape, jagged chocolate creases and bumps here and there which are far from uniform. I pop the morsel in my mouth with a flick of the wrist and I realize… Raisinets are pretty deep. No, I haven’t been smoking anything.
Spill open a bag of Raisinets and take a good look at all the little pieces. Some are weird and lumpy like the one I just ate, but most of them look pretty similar: small oval-y things with no major flaws-the way they were intended to be manufactured. However, it’s not just appearance that makes each class of Raisinet different. I find that although both Raisinets taste the same, they offer different levels of satisfaction.
The regular ones are boring! It’s the crazy ones that are more fun to eat. Why is this? Shouldn’t the ones that agree with the conventional plan be better? No. It’s precisely the weird shapes, different texture, and double raisin-clusters that make the deformed ones great. It’s the Raisinets with novelty that are the most intriguing.
Why am I ranting about candy? Because Raisinets serve as a good metaphor for how we should consider molding our identities. Weird right?
Think about those regular, run-of-the-mill types of people in your life. Sure they might be good friends or family members, but do you honestly enjoy spending a lot of time with them? Probably not. You know why? Because they’re boring as hell. Isn’t it great having Grandpa Snoozeville over for Thanksgiving every year? Talking to the stuffing would be more mentally stimulating. These people are, in a sense, the human equivalent of the regular Raisinet. They are like most of the other candies in the bag: plain with nothing special about them. Why would you want them when you could go for something much more enticing?
Think about the people in your life again, but this time focus on your favorite ones. I bet most of them have the same thing in common: they are interesting. There is something about their personalities, their hobbies, their views that you find absolutely captivating and different from the rest of the sheep out there. Correct me if I’m wrong, but wouldn’t you rather spend the evening talking to Uncle Awesome with green hair who explores caves when he’s not managing his own self-help consulting business? It’s the interesting qualities in people that act as natural magnets, magnets that draw more people, experiences and opportunities into their reality, ultimately enriching their lives. This is the kind of person we all must strive to be. I want you to be the bumpy Raisinet.
Uniqueness is key. What is special about you if you live the same way as everyone else? When nothing sets you apart from the pack, how the hell are you going to get noticed in the world? Therefore, you have to deviate from the curve and be your own unique person. Once you do this, you will be far more intriguing and attractive to the people you want to pull into your life.
Now don’t confuse being unique with being weird. If your idea of standing out entails wearing a pineapple hat and talking to your pet weasel at public gatherings, you’ve missed my point entirely. Don’t be a boring person with nothing special going on in your life. Let personal journeys sprout out of heartfelt interests. Be a volunteer fireman, pursue your dreams of being a stand-up comic, start a new club on campus, start designing your own clothing line and sell it on the internet, whatever. Just be creative. People gravitate towards those who are innovative and passionate, no matter how far-fetched their passions.
Whatever you do, don’t be a one-track person. People with very few interests usually haven’t put in the effort nor explored life. They are not tapping into the full potential this world offers us. So although it didn’t work out for the cat, let’s have some curiosity because that’s what inspires us to broaden our horizons. Non-curious people are boring people; and the worst thing is not only to be boring, but to feel boring.
So you’re either naturally interesting. or you realize that you’re boring. Then take action to better yourself. Take a look at your core friends and find that most of them are rather dull, too. It’s time for a change. I’m not saying you should drop your buddies or gal-pals just because all they care about is watching Sports Center or sneaking into the local bar. It just never hurts to bring new and exciting people into your life.
If you want stimulating friends, stay away from the cookie-cutter people. Especially when considering a relationship. Don’t settle for someone boring just because you two get along. Go for girls and guys with that extra something which draws people in-that novelty. Once you find this person you’ll get to experience much more than just smooches, petty quarrels and make-up sex. Every day will be more fun because of the positive energy flowing from their exciting identity. Just being around them will provide you with new experiences, subtly helping you develop your sense of self. If you really want to “find yourself” don’t spend Ma and Pa’s retirement fund to backpack across Europe. Date someone with flare!
This is not to say that you should take on every one of their opinions like an impressionable pushover. But you will be exposed to new ideas, feelings and experiences to pick and choose what you agree and disagree with. This ultimately brings into light new preferences and inclinations that you never knew you had. This is what it means to really find yourself.
One of my closest friends is quite the clumpy Raisinet. He walks around wearing a maroon leather jacket, and never shies away from an adventure. I love this guy to death but he is way too impressionable, to the point where he doesn’t have many ideas of his own. He doesn’t really get the gist of picking and choosing. He just adopts the ideas of the most persuasive speaker and defends them to the end. Conversation with him can get annoying. Although his loyal friendship and interesting persona more than make up for his shortcomings, don’t do this. Have your own thoughts and forms of expression instead of blindly following others, because how else are you going to be novel?
Let’s take careers into account for a second. Do you remember applying for colleges, and how important it was to be “well rounded?” That still applies to the rat race. Businesses do not want to take on robots with only one program buzzing through their circuits. They want a highly adaptable employee with a myriad of skills that stem from personal interests. Who has a better chance of being hired: a salesman, or a bilingual salesman with knowledge of foreign markets due to his long time fascination with the German culture? Surround yourself with intriguing people, explore new interests and discover yourself; you’ll be more marketable and compelling to potential employers.
I am encouraging you to emulate a chocolate-covered dried grape and not a pretty, shapely one. Be the misshapen piece with extra bumps of sweetness, stretching out in delightfully unexpected directions. You can be the all-around desirable person everyone is drawn to. It just takes a little self-improvement through self-discovery. Just remember that ordinary people live plain lives, but interesting people live plain better.
Nicholas Kingsbury is a sophomore economics student. You may e-mail him at