By James Parziale
Sitting helplessly in section 43 of the bleachers at Yankee Stadium last Tuesday, watching my beloved New York Yankees flail in Game 6, depression and utter disappointment washed over me.
At first, just the scoreboard made me nauseas. Watching a gimpy Curt Schilling relive his days with the Arizona Diamondbacks was enough to make the soggy $4-pretzel churn in my stomach. Knowing that the Boston Red Sox were putting on a baseball clinic in the House That Ruth Built did not help matters, either.
However, the truly grotesque moment came in the bottom of the eight after Alex Rodriguez’s hit that would have scored Derek Jeter from first was overturned. Once the umpires called Rodriguez out at first after saying he intentionally interfered with pitcher Bronson Arroyo, the Stadium erupted in disbelief and panic. Fans catapulted anything they could get their hands on at the field. A middle-aged man in the section over launched his pretzel into right field. My reaction? Stunned disbelief.
My friend Brian, also a die-hard Yankees fan, said, “Yankee Stadium has snapped. The fans have snapped.”
Two Red Sox fans sitting in the row in front of us said the umpire got the call right, and he did. Embarrassment ran through my veins at that point because, after 11 years of going to Yankees games, defending Yankees fans, and thinking that they were some of the most knowledgeable fans in sports, my perceptions came crashing down at the biggest game I ever attended.
What was the cause of this Stadium stupidity? Well, in part it was the frustration of two overturned calls for the Red Sox. The biggest reason, though, was October Fans, or Fake Fans.
These are not your well-rounded Yankees fans that have come up with the teams of the 1980s or early 1990s, or the ones that suffered through 1994’s World Series cancellation (the Yanks probably would have beaten the Expos that year). These are bandwagoners, who packed away their jerseys before Johnny Damon finished rounding the bases after depositing a grand slam into right field in Game 7.
These are “fans” that go to Yankee Stadium for the thrill, not to watch a baseball game, much like how Madison Square Garden is nowadays – a fashion show. Aside from the moronic attack on the field that forced riot police to crouch along both foul lines, other instances shocked and disappointed in my first go-around as a “bleacher creature.”
Two fans, both decked out in Yankees jerseys, showed up in the bottom of the fourth inning after the Red Sox scored four runs in the top half. They began asking how the Red Sox got their runs, and then started chanting some profanity about how the Red Sox were not good, to say the least. They ended up leaving before the end of the seventh inning. Doesn’t that just reek of loyalty?
The chants at the Stadium were also slightly egregious. Red Sox outfielder Manny Ramirez was called fat by the fans in the left field bleachers after the Sox lead, 4-0. Not a savvy chant, nor was it anything that took a shot at Manny’s fielding or lack of hitting during the ALCS. The right field fans started chanting MVP when Gary Sheffield was at bat. Not exactly the most enlightened chant with David Ortiz (ALCS and probably regular season MVP) and Ramirez in the house.
If that isn’t bad enough, a fan had the nerve to mutter something to me while I booed Felix Heredia’s entrance into the game.
“You can’t boo him. We need him to do good,” said the fan who must not have realized that a near-touchdown regular season ERA is grounds for taunting.
This string of events lead me to believe there are more fake Yankees fans than real ones infiltrating the Stadium, and here are 10 ways to know you are not of the dark side:
Real Yankees fans knew Bucky “Bleepin” Dent’s name before Aaron Boone’s homerun last year resurrected it, and know Dent won the World Series MVP in 1978, the year his famous homerun capped a 14-game comeback by the Yanks over the Sox in the AL East.
-Real fans didn’t see Boone’s homerun land last season until they watched Sportscenter afterwards.
-Real fans know that Bernie Williams was great in his prime, but his skill-set retired two seasons ago.
-Real fans quiver when the possibility of Pedro Martinez becoming a Yankee is uttered.
-Real fans mute Michael Kay, John Sterling and Charlie Steiner, and especially Tim McCarver.
-Real fans know, in hindsight, the Yankees lost this year’s series to the Sox in the bottom of the eight in Game 4.
-Real fans know what “The Curse of Don Mattingly” means.
-Real fans know the end of the dynasty did not happen last week; it crumbled when Luis Gonzalez’s bloop single won the 2001 Series for the D-Backs.
-Real fans acknowledge that losing to the Sox this year was the greatest comeback/choke in sporting history, but realize the Sox have not rid themselves of the Curse of the Bambino until they win a World Series.
And how do you snuff out a Fake Yankee Fan? Well, you’re a fake…
-If you go to a Hempstead Tpke. bar to watch a playoff game.
-f you rooted for David Wells after reading his book, knowing that he admittedly stopped trying to pitch in ALDS Game 5 in 2002, and was hung-over the day he pitched a perfect game in 1998.
-If you put up away messages during the playoffs that have players like Chili Davis quoted because that’s the first one you Googled.
-If you wear a Derek Jeter jersey because of his physical appeal and don’t know that he is the only player to ever win All-Star Game and World Series MVP in the same year.
-If you were once a Mets fan, but “converted” at some point. Please.
-If you liked Roger Clemens, who was nothing more than a mercenary.
-If you buy a new name t-shirt or jersey every last week of September.
-If you prefer George Steinbrenner’s annual off-season shopping spree for half of the league’s All-Stars instead of the Yankees teams of old that had unity.
-If you rooted for Andy Pettitte this season.
-If you were content that the Yankees beat Boston in 2003, but did not win the World Series against the Marlins.
In all fairness, Fake Fans, though very slightly, are needed. Elliott Bell, a columnist for the sports section, pointed out that bandwagon fans add to the camaraderie during playoff time. Agreed, but Yankee Stadium is no place for such uninformed hogwash. So please, Fake Fans everywhere, heed the warning: don’t disgrace the hallowed Stadium any more.
POT SHOTS
Just because this column is about Fake Yankees Fans does not mean that other teams do not suffer the same tribulations. Choosing to comment solely on my team was a conscious choice, but truth be told, this question must be posed: Where were all the Red Sox fans that flaunt their hats and jerseys, and their, “Who’s Your Papi?” shirts when the Red Sox were down 3-0? Examine these fans carefully, for some of their garb might still have the tags on in case the Sox choke to the Cardinals.
James J. Parziale is a junior print journalism major and a Senior Sports Editor for the Chronicle. If you would like to praise or debate this column, you can e-mail him at [email protected]. Responses will be published in next week’s sports section.
During Game 6 of the American League Championship Series, riot control officers had to patrol the field after Yankees fans began to shower the field with anything and everything they could get their hands on. (James Parziale/The Chronicle)