Compiled by the Hofstra Chronicle staff
On the Unispan:
Guy 1: I like your outfit
Guy 2: thanks, I’ve been wearing it for three days straight.

In Student Center:
Girl: I love how guys look at girls like they’re goddesses, but all I’m thinking is, ‘Damn am I constipated.’

In Herbert:
Guy: I’ve never heard of Thanksgivukkah. Are we getting presents instead of turkey?

Outside Cafe’ On The Quad:
Girl 1: I can’t believe Hofstra finally cancelled classes on Thanksgiving Eve.
Girl 2: Looks like President Rabinowitz wants to get his party on too.

In Breslin:
Guy: I can’t take this global warming s***. First it’s cold, then it’s warm, then there’s tornadoes in November. What’s next: polar bears becoming black bears?

In Barnard:
Girl: My mom hates me. She just told me to stay at school during Thanksgiving.

In Bits & Bytes:
Guy: What do you mean you don’t hunt for your own turkey?

In Student Center:
Girl 1: I can’t believe free iced coffee Mondays end next week.
Girl 2: They should do free hot coffee Mondays for the winter.

In Breslin:
Professor: Warren G. Harding basically turned the White House into a frat house.

We’re always listening……